Yellow Rodeo

My walk to work every day is always a source of pleasure vs. pain. I live in an "eclectic" part of town: close to the Eaton Centre, but far enough away to capture some of society's finest: roaming the streets looking for their "medicine" (for lack of a better term). I always try to get up at an early enough time to assemble something that resembles an edible lunch – which I was able to do with ease today. Then stop at the Starbucks on my route, hoping that the caffeine rush will enhance my endorphins for the day.

No I'm not.

Today was no different than any other day – up until arriving at the office building, that is. If anyone knows me well, they will tell you that I actually despise talking to strangers. This is often perceived as snobbery, or a form of elitism – but the honest to god truth is: I actually suck at human interaction. Ok, that’s a strong statement to use… but I more or less just have a talent of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time (due to my lack of censorship). From time to time, I’m even known for elaborating things – often just to get a rise out of the ears in listening distance. Anyway, today I noticed a woman lugging a very large lounge chair into the building, struggling to pry the front door open. I attempt to help her in, while noticing out of the corner of my eye she is wearing what appears to be a “Blue Rodeo” t-shirt. Now, nothing at all against Blue Rodeo, but really? At the office? Albeit, I’m quick to raise red flags – however this merits erecting the REDDEST of RED flags.

“Good Morning, like my new chair?” the 80’s rocker-fan boasted with confidence.

I couldn’t help but notice the rusty metal legs, and yellow stain which was in the dead flat centre  of the chair seat. I guess my lack of response garnered yet another conversation gem from my new “Bad Timing” friend (yes, I had to look up a Blue Rodeo song to make that pun happen).

“I bought it on Craigslist last night, and was able to pick it up on the way to work!”

A modest comparison.

Did I mention I’ve never met this woman before in my life?? I mustered up a “You don’t say!” and quickly shuffled up the stairs (a necessary route – as I knew I wouldn’t endure the elevator ride without blurting out something inappropriate). I spent the rest of my day praying that I wouldn’t run into the furniture connoisseur while exiting or entering the building for the duration of my employment.

In other news, I’ve resisted the urge to dip into the stash of Mars/Snickers/M&M’s that is shared within my department – and my soggy sandvestite (definition: sandwich/pita wrap combo) kept me full for most of my day. Now, it’s off to a screening of “Dirty Girl” at the Scotiabank Theatre – I won tickets from the very kind people at @shedoesthecity.

Until tomorrow Skinabees,

C